I am not normal... not really.

In fact, Valentine's Day has nothing to do with my pathetic life on earth (so long as I don't dine out that day). But as the day is looming, I find myself getting drown in the what-should-I-buy-for-my-boyfriend/girlfriend and how-will-you-spend-the-day talk.

well... maybe it's time for me to reflect on my singlehood.

To be frank, I am not the kind of person who can be easily got along with. I may look pleasant at workplace or social gatherings, but I know that deep down, I am not.

I am not a bad girl (not bad enough) and I try hard to be a good one (not good enough either). However, I've got some weird habits or behaviours that keep guys away.

Let me count... (You may not know some of them unless you know me so well or you have lived with me for some time.)
1. can only eat fruit at breakfast or will feel uneasy throughout the day.

2. have to take several supplement pills each night to sustain my life or will feel undone.

3. can't eat any starchy food during lunch (esp. rice) or will definitely fall asleep in the afternoon. There are only protein and fibre but no carbohydrate in my lunchbox except during holiday when I can sleep as much as I like.

4. drink only water or unsweetened tea while having meals. I can't tolerate having something sweet with something salty. (Having sweet and sour dishes is ok as basically they are salty to me, but a sweetened drink is sweet and is not salty in any sense.)

5. don't like taking photos of mine and can't smile naturally in front of the camera.

6. can't act naturally when encounter with strangers; for most of the time I will just stay mute even with my friends sometimes.

7. love desserts so much but need to share them/ have them with the others or cannot fully enjoy them.

8. can't stop eating starchy food when under pressure.

9. will become impatient, radical and bitchy when something or somebody gets on my nerve.

10. don't eat beef and don't really eat pork; don't eat instant noodles either unless in a life-or-death situation.

11. can't swim; can't sing; can't flirt; can't cook; can't play the piano; can't smile; can't converse; can't joke; can't read maps; can't put on make-up properly...

12. needs to drink tanks of water every day or will feel dehydrated.

The list still goes on...

These may sound trivial but they do matter when it comes to a romantic relationship. Believe me, they DO matter. (Of course, I won't deny that something else counts in a relationship as well. Everything single thing counts, anyway.)

Is that why I am still single? well... God knows.

Everything is fine as long as I am fine with myself--being single and being a bit weird sometimes.