A socially handicapped girl in a highly socialized community

I have written this when I first came here. Just feel like having to update my blog but ain't in the right mood of writing something new.



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Human beings are social animals. However, different cultures socialize on different levels, in different ways.

As a social handicap who economizes my social interactions, I feel just fine living in Hong Kong where people don’t really give a fig of how you’re doing without a good reason. I can get by a day encountering a series of people without having to say a word.

However, Melbourne is a problem to me. Not only do I have to say thank-yous to bus drivers, I also have to socialize with people whenever an encounter, no matter how short, is involved.

Consider this:

I’m about to pay for my grocery at a supermarket.

Cashier: Hi, how are ya?

Me (with a grin): Good, thanks. You?

Cashier: Good. $5.50 please.

Sorry. I just can’t see how that how-are-you thingy fits into the above interaction. Somehow that how-are-you and $5.50 don’t sound right together to me.

Or, consider this:

Stranger on phone: Hi, can I speak to Shan please?

Me: Speaking.


Stranger: Hi, I’m Susan from Department of Education. How are you?


Me: Good. And you?

Stranger: Good. I’m calling to tell you that…


Again, I’m totally clueless when a stranger calls to ask me how I am and it frustrates me when I’m obliged to reply him/her that I’m doing fine, whether or not I mean it. It frustrates me more when people don’t really care about you ask you how well you fare.

On the contrary, people in Hong Kong are more objective. When your friends ask you: 近排點呀, people usually say都係咁啦. Fair enough.

I know I shouldn’t have taken it seriously but at some point during my first month here, this sort of empty socialization drained me especially when you had to deal with different people in a day to set things up, having to say good-how-are-yous and thank-yous with a smile to a bunch of strangers. I don’t mean to be rude but I’m handicapped. Sometimes I just don't want to say anything.

Now, I have worked such canned response into the fabric of my speech programme so that I can tell others that I’m doing fine with a pleasant expression on my worst days.


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When I feel bad, just let me fall. When I hit the ground (luckily I always do), I will pull myself up and drag myself out of the gloom.


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Thank God it is getting warmer here and so I'm more mobilized now. I'm a weather-sensitive person and a perfect candidate of SAD should I live in Norway.