Sunday, July 19, 2009

Very brief update

I went to Mornington Peninsula doing some work for my supervisor and she took me to a cafe overlooking the beach. So here comes the photo time...

A very chilly, cloudy day - but it didn't stop people from hitting the beach :)

Pancake Pancake Pancake for lunch! la la la - Did I mention it's warm? :)


A cosy cafe with a fireplace - should have taken a shot of that as well

oh, this pic has nothing to do with my Mornington trip. I took it from my own place one day after rain. You know winter here is also the rainy season, which makes winter more freezing than the actual temperature. But the nice thing about raining is, apart from lifting the water reserve, you can spot a rainbowly rainbow afterwards most of the time.
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Hey I've got good news! ooops, is that the first time I break any good news here? On my blog? Hmmmm... anyway, I just got the Faculty Publication Award which covers all the cost for me to attend a 5-day conference in Canberra in late Nov. Okay, it's Canberra. And it's a conference. *eyes rolling* But it's frrrreeeeeee - and I'm going to splash all of their money :)
How much I miss a real summer ^^

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Parent Stupidity

I wasn’t surprised when I read this or this. I mean, I would be surprised if that girl really got pregnant by a stray sperm swimming in chlorinated pool water. It’s like contracting AIDS through breathing. She would be the second human being in history, the first one being Virgin Mary, who got conceived without any sexual intercourse (or surrogacy or whatever, you get the idea). I would be surprised too if a teenage girl could actually fall asleep while her face being tattooed (was she stoned or something?). What doesn’t surprise me is parent stupidity.

If you have been a teacher long enough, the chance is you would have encountered at least one of those parents who believe whatever crap their children dish out. Don’t get me wrong, trust is highly valuable; it is the bedrock of any relationship. But there is a very fine line between unconditional trust and dumbness. I’ve lost count of the number of times parents told me how angelic and naïve their kids are, even when they were given hard evidence how their kids bullied others or cheated at school. To these parents, the whole school including all teachers and students pick on their kids as if it is the only one thing that unites the whole school.

If their stupidity ends there, that’s fine. Parenting isn’t always effective anyway. And deep down I always admire the sort of loyalty and faith these parents have in their kids despite the occasional misjudgment they may have. On reflection, I doubt I could blindly believe my kids (not that I have any) and defense them like these people and that really challenges my suitability of being a parent. Moreover, I lied to my parents when I was a kid as well. Sometimes I could get away with it, sometimes I couldn’t. I mean, doesn't everyone do the same thing?

However when these parents start suing people like those in the news, it’s another story. I’ve seen parents staging the whole crying stunt in the media or making the accusation to Department of Education just because their kids were, in their view, unfairly treated (like being failed or given a demerit for a “minor” offense or suspended from classes or given too much homework). The current education system in Hong Kong has put schools in a very vulnerable position that school principals almost bow to parents and students in order to stay away from negative publicity and ensure a steady flow of enrolment. A parent’s letter is almost like a get-out-of-jail-free card for students to excuse themselves from Physical Education lessons (no, kids in Hong Kong don’t like PE lessons even if they like sports), unfavourable school events, drug tests or excursion.

And you wonder why kids don’t learn to respect others these days.

I don’t want to sound like I’m putting all the blame on parents as I do admire those parents who always offer the best to their kids and never give up on them even when the system/world fails them. However, unconditional affection and trust do not automatically translate into submissiveness. And sometimes, parents with a clear, sane mind can help their kids learn about their mistake before they repeat it when they grow up. They can’t always get away with it – better learn that sooner than later.

If you're in any doubt, the best thing to do is to follow your common sense as it works 99% of the times. If you tragically are one of those who are not blessed with any, just bear in mind that you don't come across X-file type of incidents that often - they are just over-represented in the media.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

We are all Narcissus deep down.

Have you ever before met that egocentric person who always subconsciously steers the conversation to him-/herself? Like when I mentioned it’s depressingly freezing here in Melbourne they would immediately respond that it’s sweltering in Hong Kong. And when I said I felt sleepy as I woke up early on a wintery morning to commute to Mornington, the egocentric would say it’s routine for them to wake up early for work and only sleep for a few hours. When I said I have established a lot in Hong Kong they would reflect that they have done the same things in Melbourne and so would not contemplate going back to Hong Kong. And when I said I was tired they would launch into a detailed account of how they "out-tired" me.


That is not sharing or an exchange of words. It’s just a monologue.


That sense of self preoccupation is no secret to us yet remains an evolutionary mystery (at least to me!) in a highly socialized community where race survival partly hinges on communication. But now I’m puzzled, is understanding or a two-way communication essential to human evolution or existence or is it just some luxurious concept that happens to pop up in some modern human societies where hunger and warmth are no longer pressing issues?


We all too conveniently use our own experience as a yardstick for measuring others’ happiness, problems, distress, and simply, life. That’s why we are programmed to compare, using ourselves as the baseline.


We never know how well or crappy we fare until we compare ourselves against others. That sense of comparison is innate in human nature. That’s why we succumb to peer pressures when we are young and social pressure as we grow old. While suckers are often encouraged to compare themselves against those living in the Third World or the most deprived spots on earth or this, such kind of comparison can be quite pathetic sometimes as our self-esteem and life satisfaction tends to build on others’ misfortune.


While downward social comparison makes us feel happy and protects our ego, upward social comparison keeps our society in an upward swirl of material development or achievement (that’s how that freaky Guinness World Records thingy comes into existence - though I can never make out whether it's for upward or downward comparison). Think the building next country is higher than ours? Build an even higher one!

It seems that comparison, both upward and downward, alone can make us happy and motivated and keep our society advancing materially. Maybe that’s why we’re all Narcissus by default; that we perceive the world in our own biased way without knowing that there's a blind spot in our view; and that what we see in others is just a reflection of our own ego. So where does understanding and empathy come into play? They seem to be learned skills though not many people pick up a lot along the way.

Thursday, July 09, 2009

The best way to update a blog when you have no time to write is…

...to upload photos. To be frank, people actually linger longer on a photo post than a wordy one as I have been repeatedly told that there’s too much English for them to digest. We’re all visual beings in this age of short attention span when speed is everything and our brain can no longer process too many words. I can’t help wondering how many people do read through what I’ve written instead of the blog titles. Anyway, writing a blog is more for fulfilling my Narcissist urge than getting readership… alright alright, I really should stop myself from launching into another long-winded wordy post before you click away.

So yesterday I spent a sunny late winter afternoon at Brighton Beach.



It's winter :)


A peaceful afternoon



A long line of colorful bath boxes facing the beach



More to go...


And more...


A cloudless day




They are numbered.








The sun was setting.


The golden ray was splashed on the boxes.


Sunset with a lonesome silhouette...a bit cliche but still lovely

The sky was a lovely color when I left.